


gold

by flowersandsunshine



Series: music of the heart [4]
Category: Lovely Little Losers, Nothing Much to Do
Genre: Donalduke - Freeform, F/M, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 15:47:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6382705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowersandsunshine/pseuds/flowersandsunshine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They both feel broken, but maybe their brokenness is what makes them truly beautiful.<br/>Set to the song "Gold" by Britt Nicole.</p>
            </blockquote>





	gold

1\. This is for all the girls / Boys all over the world

John Donaldson figured he had three things going for him – he owned up to his mistakes, his brother really seemed to love him, and he was clever. Perhaps too clever for his own good.

Hero Duke figured she had everything going for her. Except for one thing – maybe the world itself was against her.

\---

They weren’t friends. Not really. Sort of. Sometimes they saw each other at parties, or across the hall at school, or on the street, walking to the shops with friends. Sometimes they waved and smiled at each other. Sometimes they breathed a sigh of relief when the other didn’t notice them. So, no, they weren’t friends. They were acquaintances with history. Just like Meg and Robbie. Just like Cora and John. Just like Claudio and Hero. 

\---

Hero didn’t know what she had done wrong. Her life had been wonderful – full of sunshine and warmth and laughter and nothing much to do. She had felt like it was too good to be true, and then almost cursed herself when she turned out to be right. Her birthday, and then Beatrice just up and leaving her for Wellington, taking Margaret with her, and Ursula leaving, and then Leo… It all piled up and stacked onto her shoulders, like brick after brick of devastating news, shifting her world, forcing her to start over yet again.

Georgia and Hugh felt like the only real constant in her life. Georgia would text her pictures of animals she saw on the street. Hugh was constantly bringing over new chapters of his story for her to edit. 

It was a very cute story, she admitted to herself, flipping through one on one particular night. She even found herself in it – a small girl with golden hair and a shining personality. Dogberry had always called her that before. She giggled to herself slightly, pleased. It felt nice to be recognized like that. 

If she was honest… and she was, she couldn’t help it… Hero missed all the attention she used to get from everyone.

\---

John read a lot. Kafka was one of his favorites. Homer. Dickenson, too, if he was brave enough to admit it to anyone else. (Peter knew. He tried to make sure Peter was the only one.) (John Donaldson was not brave.)

The library was his favorite place. He sat there quite often, head bent over book, floppy hair falling over his eyes, eyes scanning each page with a ferocity that scared others. 

John Donaldson scared a lot of people sometimes.

He didn’t really have a lot of friends. Verges followed him around sometimes. After solving “the mystery” last year, she had decided that they were friends. They weren’t, but it was nice to have someone to talk to sometimes. The weekly phone calls with Peter just weren’t enough human interaction for one person. 

Sometimes, he said hi to Cora.

Other than that, well… He had his books. That was all he really needed.

\---

2\. Whatever you’ve been told / You’re worth more than gold

Graduation happened without problems. 

Hero loved the commencement. Leo was getting better, and everyone was in town – everyone. Meg came back. Ben and Beatrice were there, holding hands. Freddie sent a card. Peter and Balthazar beamed at her, sitting with Peter’s family. Her mums were there, crying. It was lovely. She was excited and happy and golden and glowing for the first time in a long time.

\---

John didn’t really see what the big deal was, but he hugged Peter as soon as he saw his brother. 

He ended up hugging Balthazar, and his parents, step or otherwise, and Ben wanted a hug, and suddenly everyone was hugging everyone and a picture was taken by somebody where everyone was smiling, and John was laughing at something Hero, standing next to him, had just said. 

He hung it on his wall.

\---

“Are you scared for what’s next?” Hero asked that night at the party.

John gave her a weird look. They hadn’t really talked since… “What do you mean?”

“Uni. Life. Grown-up life.” Hero gave a nervous giggle and took a tiny sip of her drink to cover it. “Are you scared?”

He shrugged and dropped his book onto the end table next to him. “Are you?”

She nodded. 

They talked the whole night.

\---

They got tipsy later on and became more open with their conversations. 

“Do you ever feel like a really shitty person?” John mused. “Because of, like, your past?”

Hero was curled up on the floor, back pressed against the wall, arms wrapped around her knees. She glanced up in surprise. “Do you?”

He shrugged. “Yeah. All the time. I mean, I’m… I cause trouble. It’s just who I am.”

Hero gave a dead sounding laugh and shook her head. “I’m usually lost in the aftermath.”

John’s face crumpled and he stared down at the floor.

“I think,” Hero continued without looking at him, “that’s when we really find out who we are. I mean… You apologized. I got stronger.”

John glanced up at her quizzically. 

Hero stared at her drink. “I mean, that’s just what I think. Maybe I’m not being clear.” She gave another nervous giggle, something John was really beginning to find annoying. “Maybe it’s just the alcohol talking.”

“An apology doesn’t fix a disaster,” John said, frowning.

“No. But it’s a start.” Hero shrugged.

\---

“Have you ever felt like someone carved out your insides and left them beside you for the whole world to see?” Hero whispered. 

They were lying on the porch in the backyard, staring up at the sky. It was a lovely, clear night, stars shining brightly without a care for what was happening on the planet below them.

John was quiet for a long time. “When I moved to New Zealand.”

Hero glanced at him quickly but his face was obscured by shadows. 

“You?” he finally asked.

“Guess,” she said wryly. 

He gave an odd little smile. “Yeah, I guess that was a stupid question.”

“It makes me feel so broken,” she admitted.

John’s breath caught as he sat up to stare down at the young lady lying down, face vulnerable and eyes watery with unshed emotion. “Hero, how could you ever think that?”

Hero sat up slowly. Her eyeliner was slightly smudged. “What do you mean?”

“You’re… you’re strong. You’ve made it through so much. You’re… incredible. Not broken. And even if you are broken…” John paused. “I saw some artwork once at a museum I liked back in England. There was broken pottery, and it was put back together again with gold. The brokenness just made the pottery more beautiful, more valuable.” He nudged her shoulder. “Like you.”

Hero sniffed and ducked her head. 

“But I…” John laughed, sudden exhaustion washing over him. “I am Humpty Dumpty. I cannot be put together again.”

Hero slowly reached over and took his hand, gently.

Somehow, her eyes said all that her mouth never could have.

\---

3\. So hold your head up high / It’s your time to shine

Hero ran across the street. “John!” she called. “Wait!”

John popped his head out the car window. “Hero,” he said, smiling easily. 

Somehow, they had fallen into an easy friendship, one that fed him and encouraged him and was everything he needed that summer. They texted constantly and were quick to defend each other. Oddly, it worked. 

(Sometimes, there was a flash of “what if”, but it was always replaced by shoulder nudges and affectionate hair tousles. Maybe in the future. Maybe if they ever healed completely. Maybe in another universe.)

“I just wanted to give you this,” Hero said, panting slightly, her cheeks flushed from the adrenaline rush. She held out her hand.

John reached out and took it, surprised. “What…?” 

“I figured, if you ever needed to call me right away, you would need a way to do that. If I’m not at my computer, I mean,” she said quickly, brushing her hair out of her face. “So just put this on your computer, and you can make calls from Skype to a cell phone, anywhere in the world, free of charge.” Hero grinned.

“This is incredible,” John said, gaping at her. “Really?”

She nodded. “Really.”

Opening the car door, he got out and gave her a tight hug. “I’ll miss you.”

“Oh, please.” Hero laughed and hugged him back. “You’ll be so busy having fun in England, studying literature and theater and art and who knows what else, you won’t have time to miss me.”

He chuckled. “That’s right. I will never think of you.”

She rolled her eyes and released him. “Okay. I don’t want you to miss your plane. Right, Mrs. Donaldson?”

Ann waved at her from inside the car.

“I’ll see you around, Donaldson,” Hero said teasingly.

John smiled again, a little self-conscious. “Well.” He cleared his throat. “Have fun at uni.”

“You, too.” 

John stared at her for a little bit, her short hair blowing in her face, her cheeks reddened, her eyes starting to tear up, before nodding and getting back into the car.

Hero waved as he drove away.

\---

From: Hero   
do you remember what you said to me so long ago? about not being able to heal your brokenness?

John frowned at the text and answered tentatively. 

To: Hero  
Yes?

From: Hero  
You are not broken, John. You radiate light.

From: Hero  
if you don’t believe me, ask your mom

John looked over at his mom, driving calmly down the road taking them to the airport. He cleared his throat. “Am I happier than I used to be?”

Her smile was all the answer he needed.

To: Hero  
What a pair of golden children we make.

From: Hero  
:) too true, my friend.

\---

4\. So don’t be afraid to wear your crown / You’re a king, you’re a queen, inside and out

John pressed the ‘answer call’ button on Skype. He smiled automatically when Hero’s beaming face filled the screen. “Hero!” he exclaimed. “Welcome to England!” He motioned around to the campus behind him.

Hero laughed. “It looks lovely, John. Just lovely.”

He beamed. “Thank you.”

She laughed again. 

What a pair of golden children they made.

Their brokenness only made them more beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

> i am donalduke TRASH but i am also platonic!donalduke trash so here ya go  
> (maybe someday. in another life. in another universe. this is such a maybe ship and it's beautiful for that.)


End file.
